How He Loves

It seems to me that lately with everything I do, God reminds me of His love for me. And this is even more significant because I really need to be reminded of His love, because I've had some down days recently. I get to these points in my life where I just cry out to God and just wonder what in the world I'm missing, what is it that I am not getting.. and then he reminds me of his love. He's right, but that does not really surprise me because He always is. I realize that I will absolutely never grasp the true picture of His love. I will never understand what this whole unconditional love thing is all about. I will never be able to fully accept His love for me or experience it in it's greatness because of the simple fact that I know that I am completely unworthy of it. And I realize my unworthiness every single day. And it's on the days that I recognize how messed up I am and my unworthiness of His love, that He puts the lyrics to that song "How He Loves" in my mind. And then they echo over and over in my mind and I picture the images of this loving God. Have you ever really contemplated those worship songs that you sing to Him? Especially "How He Loves".

"He is jealous for me" -- I wrote an entry on this a little while ago. His jealousy for me completely consumes me. How could I do that to Him? And yet I continue to ignore Him in so many circumstances everyday.

"Love is like a hurricane, I am a tree, bending beneath the weight of His wind and mercy" -- I picture a hurricane that I've seen footage of on TV, the kind that can rip up every car and house and tree from the ground and destroy anything in it's path. I picture the remainder of New Orleans after hurricane Katrina and just what power a hurricane has over us and over the earth. This same power can be channeled to God's love. He has the power to rip us up and destroy us and change us, which He does by covering us with His mercy. And remember what mercy is: not receiving something that we truly deserve. We have no control over what a hurricane does, just like we have no control over what God does with His love for us. He shapes us and molds us and rips us apart everyday because He knows what is best for us. He withholds so much from us that are consequences of our actions simply because He loves us more than we can imagine. THIS is why love is a hurricane.

"When all of a sudden I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory. And I realize just how beautiful You are and how great Your affections are for me." When we come to know Christ and make a pact in our hearts that we are going to live for Him, His glory now covers us and He makes us new. He turns every evil and ugly thing within us to gold with his glory covering it. He uses us despite our cracks and bruises and turns us into glory. This verse reminds me of those days that a light bulb goes off in my brain, and I realize something about myself that I never realized before. Like the day I realize that the reason why I'm acting a certain way is because I'm holding bitterness in my heart. Or the day that I realize that the reason why I'm holding back from God is because of my shame for past mistakes that I've made. Or the day that I realize that maybe everything is not really okay like I've been making it out to be behind the pretending and all the smiles. Those are the days that I realize He covers my afflictions with his glory. He completely eclipses them, so that they are still there, but they reflect his glory instead of reflecting my own brokenness. And it is true, times like these I do realize His beauty and how much He does love me. I mean, think about it. How great are His affections for you? Much greater than can even be measured!

We will never be able to grasp His love. We will never be able to get our minds around it and understand it in the least bit. We will never even be able to return it in the same capacity. But we can still consume our lives with it and live abundantly in it. Experience His love, for his affections for you are great.

God's presence

I've been reading through the Old Testament for a while now, and have spent a lot of time in Exodus recently trying to read between the lines and pull God's wisdom out of the pages. I highly suggest it to everyone, because I'm learning more and more everyday, just how much the Old Testament really has about God's power and provision for our lives. It is so necessary for us to dig deep into the Words God has written for us and not just skip over it because it is ancient years old. What I found today was Exodus 24, verses 15-18, the last few verses in the chapter.

Then Moses went up on the mountain, and the cloud covered the mountain. The glory of the Lord dwelt on Mount Sinai, and the cloud covered it six days. And on the seventh day he called to Moses out of the midst of the cloud. Now the appearance of the glory of the Lord was like a devouring fire on the top of the mountain in the sight of the people of Israel. Moses entered the cloud and went up on the mountain. And Moses was on the mountain forty days and forty nights.

The presence of God was obviously with Moses on Mount Sinai. This verse mentions that a cloud covered the mountain for six days before Moses even hiked up. Can you imagine being at the bottom of this huge mountain with a heavy cloud covering it, and God calls you from the cloud and tells you to start hiking? I would be scared to death of what could possibly be in that cloud. Moses could not even see what was on the mountain. He could be climbing to his death, for all he knew, right?

The people of Israel saw the whole thing go down. They can see the cloud, but when the Lord calls to Moses and tells him to start hiking, they can see something else too. They don't see the Lord talking to Moses, but they see God's glory alright. They see the glory of the Lord, and you know what it looks like? A fire that is consuming all of the mountain. This cloud and this fire on the mountain were tools that God used. They served as evidence to the people that God's presence was with Moses.

I can only imagine what the people thought as the fire was burning the mountain and Moses started to hike up that thing. They probably thought he was crazy, and perhaps they were scared that their leader was going to be consumed in the fire of God's glory and they'd never see him again. God was so real to them and so powerful to them that they knew he could do anything with Moses. I know that they must have been afraid for Him to go up there. God's presence was a serious deal and it meant a lot to them all.

God's presence should be with all of us, too. God's glory and presence was with Moses because in previous chapters he prayed for it. Moses was consistently seeking to please God in all that he attempted to do because he knew the severity of it. He knew that God's presence was serious and that he needed it to consume his life. God's presence can go with all of us too if we are seeking it and striving to remain focused on Him. Moses is our example. We see in these verses how the presence of God was with Him, and the Lord showed the people evidence of this by burning that fire on the mountain. So what is the evidence that God leaves behind us? If God's presence is among us, there should be evidence of it in our own lives too.

God may not hover a cloud over you as His presence goes with you in life, and He may not ask you to climb a mountain that looks like it is burning. But God's presence should be with you everywhere, and He will go with you if you continue to seek Him. God always leaves proof of Himself in everything, like His fingerprints are all over this Earth in His creation. So think about this:

Are you taking Him seriously?
Is there evidence of God's presence in your life?
What is it?